The most important job in the world… being a Mum!

21

Julia with baby Daniel As Mother's Day approaches we'll have the same debate in our house that we've always had ever since I gave birth to Daniel. My partner Chris doesn't buy me a card because he says 'You're not my mother'!

Of course he's right, however I'm the mother of his children, so I'd like a card! I do get flowers, and sometimes even a little gift, but never a card. I wonder, do your husbands/partners get you a card, and should I let it bother me? Probably not, after all it's only a piece of paper!

My best ever Mother's Day was the first one I experienced as a mum. I always knew I wanted children because I love them, even tiny babies that don't seem to do much except eat and sleep! I'd made a conscious decision to delay having children until I was out of my twenties and was very fortunate to fall pregnant and give birth just six months into my thirties.


The night that Daniel was born I just lay awake looking at him in awe. I understood what all-consuming love was for the first time. I can honestly say that I love being a mother and I hope that maybe I've been able to help and guide Daniel and Sophie through the good times and the bad with love and understanding. Even though they're grown up now, I'm still there for them and I always will be.

In the photo above Daniel was five month's old and it was taken just after my 'first' Mother's Day. When I was looking for the photo I came across a stash of cards I've kept from both him and Sophie over the years. Amid all the tears – they always get the tissues ready when I'm opening their cards – I read this verse and wanted to share it with you:

Because of your love Mum I've always felt sure
I'm important in somebody's eyes
You've always been there to encourage and care
Accepting, supportive and wise
Because of the confidence you have in me
I believe that my dreams can come true
And I can't find the words that will really express
All the love in my heart Mum for you

Sophie and Daniel I love this verse because it's so true of the way I feel about my own Mum, and my late Dad, too, and I'm so pleased that she'll be able to come and stay with me this weekend. Maybe we'll even go through some old photos together.

This other photo is my favourite one of Daniel and Sophie that I keep on my desk at home – aren't they cute?!

So before I dissolve into tears again, can I just wish all the new Mums a very special day on Sunday, and that of course includes our very own Sara G and lovely Keeley from Elemis – who I'll have the immense pleasure of working with from next Saturday (20th March) on the Elemis mini series. Don't forget to put in your diary!

Lots of love and Happy Mother's Day,
Julia. xx.

21 Comments

  1. Pauline Johnson March 13, 2010 at 1:26 am -  Reply

    Debbie my husband of 49 years is exactly the same,that I am not his mother (though sometimes I feel like it) but I have three lovely sons who always give me cards and presents (which I usually choose off of QVC) even though they have wives of ther own now.Sadly my mum has gone now also my dad,but I have my sons and my five grandchildren to love (not forgetting the other half!).Love to read your blogs.
    Pauline

  2. Pauline Johnson March 13, 2010 at 1:30 am -  Reply

    Sorry Julia just read my comment back dont know why I called you Debbie was to late to to delete it
    Apolgies Pauline

  3. kim March 13, 2010 at 8:41 am -  Reply

    Hi Julia, I know what you mean about cards (it’s a female thing). My son is at university and I have to remind him to send me a card ’cause if he forgot I know he’d be as upset as me.

  4. Marg March 13, 2010 at 6:01 pm -  Reply

    I have to say my husband agrees with Chris, he maintains he is not my child,I then have to ask why does he act as if he is,I’m just joking he has bought a card for me since my first mothers day,which wasnt yesterday,and written it out for the boys until they were old enough to do it themselves.It was always from them not from him and he bought the gift,always with the same threat that they would get the bill when they got a job.My sons are now mature men with responsible jobs and they always buy Joe a little gift on mothers day ‘to be taken off the account’. It has become a private family joke and they buy me a little gift on fathers day,just because we are a very close partnership,scratch Joe and I bleed, so we share each others day.Well we did bring them up together. I hope you have a lovely day with your Mother,I am sure she treasures every minute with you,
    God Bless,
    Marg.

  5. rosie letkey March 13, 2010 at 6:41 pm -  Reply

    I lost my mum at 16 yrs of age – and think my hubby feels very awkward about Mother’s Day! I’m not sure he knows whats the best to do………..or not – mention it and buy a card from my kids….or doing nothing at all!! and so,he does nothing at all!! my kids are now teenagers and this has been the first year that they have bought cards themselves – which,to be honest,mean more than my hubby buying them when they were little.
    I work with small children and like you just couldn’t wait to have my own.Children bring something so special to our lives.
    Hope you have a good day Julia (I’m off to visit my mother in law because my hubby won’t do it!!!)

  6. hilary west March 14, 2010 at 9:01 pm -  Reply

    Hi Julia ,
    I just want to say what a lovely person you are.Your presenting is so professional but down to earth and i can honestly say you and Debbie Flint are my favourite presenters. I to am a mum to a Daniel and i must say i got a little emotional reading your blog,memories of he too was a baby,he is 20 now lol .So,happy mothers day to you and all of the mums today xx
    H

  7. elaine sallis March 14, 2010 at 9:09 pm -  Reply

    HI JULIA
    I agree with you being a mum is wonderful. One question when do you ever stop worrying about them mine are 29 and 26 and still want to treat them as though they are three!!!
    I am going to be a granny in June so perhaps that will change things or just give me one more to worry about!
    Elaine

  8. christine tinley March 15, 2010 at 12:32 am -  Reply

    Hi Julia
    I used to get really upset because my husband used to say “You’re not my mother.” I didn’t get a card until the children were old enough to send one. It really hurt as I reasoned that if he could see I was upset why couldn’t he just bend and buy me one anyway. Still, that was many years ago now, and today I got ones not only off my daughters, but the grandchildren too! (By the way, I’m still with HIM, so he can’t be all bad, can he?)

  9. Sandra Gray March 15, 2010 at 2:41 pm -  Reply

    Hi Julia
    I lost my mum when I was also 16 and miss her terribly even now I’m 45 but my own daughter who is 14 is the love of my life and she makes such a fuss of me on mothers day that in many ways makes me remember how much I would love to be giving my lovley mum a card, flowers, chocs…………..
    God bless you Julia, you do brighten my day when I see you

  10. julia roberts March 15, 2010 at 10:25 pm -  Reply

    Hi Pauline
    No problem about the wrong name. Guess what????? I had a card from Chris, but now I feel I embarrassed him into it and that was not my intention.
    I guess grandchildren will be the next stage in my life but I don’t mind waiting a while longer!!!
    Hope you enjoyed your day and pleased you enjoy my blogs
    love
    Julia x

  11. julia roberts March 15, 2010 at 10:28 pm -  Reply

    Hi Kim
    I think that’s really sweet that you are concerned for the way your son would feel if he forgot.
    Hope you enjoyed the day even though he wasn’t there
    love
    Julia x

  12. julia roberts March 15, 2010 at 10:36 pm -  Reply

    Hello Marg
    You made me smile with your “then why does he behave as if he is?” comment. Also I must say that Chris always sent me cards from the children until they were old enough to do it themselves.
    I had a lovely day with the children and my Mum. Chris unfortunately wasn’t around as he had a gig in Leicester.
    The sun shone and Mum and I managed to do a bit of gardening – I am always grateful for her help in the garden as no-one else in the family is keen.
    much love
    Julia x

  13. julia roberts March 15, 2010 at 10:42 pm -  Reply

    Hi Rosie
    I’m so sorry you lost your Mum at such a young age – it must be devastating at any age but when you are just becoming a woman yourself and needing advice and understanding it must have been a terrible time.
    Sounds like you have a kind and thoughtful husband – did his Mum miss him??
    love
    Julia x

  14. julia roberts March 15, 2010 at 10:45 pm -  Reply

    Hi Hilary
    Thanks for the lovely compliments and pleased to know I’m not the only emotional wreck when it comes to looking at the baby pictures!
    Hope you and ‘your’ Daniel spent the day together.
    love
    Julia x

  15. julia roberts March 15, 2010 at 10:50 pm -  Reply

    Hello Elaine
    On speaking to my Mum about this question, the answer is never and I’m inclined to agree. Don’t you find as you grow older you can empathise with your own parents so much more.
    Congratulations on the forthcoming expectation, hope everything goes smoothly …….. do let me know.
    love
    Julia x

  16. julia roberts March 15, 2010 at 10:56 pm -  Reply

    Hi Christine
    That was my point exactly!!!!!!!! It mattered to me, so just keep the peace and send a card – not a big deal for him. Well I got one this year, and you know what? – it didn’t feel right as he has resisted all these years. I suppose he is now in a lose lose situation!!
    As you say I am still with him after 32 years so it can’t be that big a deal and he is kind in so many other ways.
    Wishing you many more years together
    love
    Julia x

  17. julia roberts March 15, 2010 at 11:02 pm -  Reply

    Hi Sandra
    Both you and Rosie have made me even more aware of how lucky I am to still have my Mum. I am so pleased you have such a loving and caring daughter to help fill the void. I hope you stay close to her and develop the fantastic friendship I have with Sophie as she grows into adulthood.
    much love
    Julia x

  18. elaine sallis March 16, 2010 at 8:31 pm -  Reply

    Hi julia
    thank for your reply i lost my my mum when i was in my twenties she was only 53 and lost my dad two years ago. I agree that you do empathise more and miss the conversations I would have had with my mum during the last few years if she had been here. I still miss her and have just had my 54th birthday which was really bitter sweet as I am now older than she was when she died and that has made me realise how young she really was. We really must live for the day and cherish all the time we have with our families. Hope that wasnt too depressing. Treasure your mum
    Elaine

  19. Kathleen Donnelly March 16, 2010 at 9:27 pm -  Reply

    Hello Julia,
    Lots of response from your Mothers Day blog, You have lovely children, we all look back at the photo’s – ahhhh – My 4 boys ( I still call them boys but they are all grown) send me cards and pressies..on Mothers day, two of them still at home, Twins, and they still send one card between them !… this years read ”Mothers Day reminds me of how lucky I am to have a Mum like you.” and they are 24!!!.. I just wish 2 nice young ladies would sweep them off their feet.. (I think they are going to be at home forever!!! ) Maybe I treat them too well!!! I am more showered with Presents than ever before, which is nice… who say’s Geordy men arn’t giving ?
    I Always love to see your smiling face on qvc, you are genuine and that comes across.. Love reading your blogs.. Best Wishes to you and your lovely family.
    Kathleen x

  20. julia roberts March 17, 2010 at 10:54 pm -  Reply

    Hello Elaine
    I do treasure my Mum – I drove her back to Nottingham today after her stay with us, and I marvel at how well she is for her 83 years. I’m so sorry you didn’t have more time with your Mum. You and I are the same age – I will be 54 in June – and I agree it doesn’t seem to be old at all.
    much love
    Julia x

  21. julia roberts March 17, 2010 at 11:01 pm -  Reply

    Hello Kathleen,
    Thankyou for your kind comments and so pleased you enjoy reading the blog! Daniel and Sophie are living at home at the moment and I too wonder if it’s because thet are too comfortable, but actually I think it’s more of a needs must with my two as London is so expensive for them to try and get a place on their own.
    When those 2 young ladies come along and take your boys away I bet you’ll miss them like mad, but I’m sure they’ll still be sending you cards and pressies. Hope you had a lovely day
    love
    Julia x

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