My Looma…


Ali and LucyI know Mother's Day isn't until the 10th March but here at QVC we are jumping in a little early with a very special day to highlight and celebrate the relationship between a mother and her daughter. Those of you who write to me regularly and read this blog will know a fair bit about my first born, but there's a lot you may not have been aware of. I thought as this was a special day I would like to share a little of what makes my girlie so special to me…

My Lucy… She could have been an Amy or Megan, but the moment she was born and handed to me I just knew she was definitely a Lucy. She was actually my sweet pea for a long while, then when the boys were born 'mummy's little helper', in fact she answers to any number of variations on a theme but My Looma is my favourite.

She was born 10 days early weighing six pounds 12 ounces, and after a relatively short but traumatic delivery, she emerged with a mass of dark curls and deep blue eyes… I knew then she was a fighter. But she is also one of the most thoughtful creatures I know… from the moment she could draw and then write, she has made beautiful cards, has written poems for me, letters of good luck and sometimes notes of comfort. I still have the lucky penny she wrapped in tissue and gave to me before my first stint on This Morning :)

In the hardest times following my separation, she bought me a silver necklace shaped like a piece of jigsaw, and gave me a card with the words "because no matter which pieces of the puzzle you lose or gain, you will always have this piece… Me, Sam and Jack". Divorce is never easy but inspite of all the heartache and upheaval, Lucy achieved an excellent degree at Derby University and went onto teacher training.

Lucy when she was littleI think she gets some of her determination from me, but is far more focussed than I was at her age which is why she took on the role of Head of film and Media at a huge secondary school when she was just 25! An awesome achievement I felt :)

It was no surprise to me though that she'd followed this route because even as a little girl she loved acting and drama. Along with her leading role as Princess Sita in her school's Diwali Festival (all three hours of it!), I still have somewhere a marvellous cameo performance of her at 7 years old with her two front teeth missing! It's not only me she entertains and looks after, but she has been a really good big sister to Sam and Jack too…. 

I'll never forget calling her to tell her I was poorly… I wanted to wait until I was with her but she had insisted I call as soon as I had the results, and it was she who picked the boys up so that they were all waiting for me when I got home…. It was Lucy who ordered the books about breast reconstruction and Living with Cancer, who bought me special pyjamas and toiletries to take into hospital, who visited me every day, and gave me the courage to finally look under my bandages for the first time after surgery…

She arranged Mothers Day in 2011 while I was undergoing treatment and complimented me on the wig that I wore for the first time to the restaurant…. In the last two years she's been there for me whenever I have needed her, stayed positive when I was frightened and strong when I was weak…. I have only seen her cry once…. And that was last April when she like I, thought the cancer had spread ….

The words she had inscribed on the bangles I always wear are now my mantra " Hope is the thing with feathers that perches in the soul, and sings the words without the tune, and never stops at all"…

And so when her marriage to Richard sadly ended last year, I was able to be there for her, to support and love her in the same way she has always supported and loved me…

It's a funny thing. but as a woman when you give birth to sons, there is something quite extraordinary about producing a child who is physically the absolute opposite to you. I loved that difference and still sometimes find it strange to think I brought these six foot strong men into the world, how they needed me then, but how they have grown up and away from me. With Lucy I had no preconceptions of what or who she should be, yet she has become the kind of woman I always aspired to be… Beautiful, kind, clever, thoughtful and loving… My Looma …

Ali xx


  1. Claire Downing March 4, 2013 at 12:27 am -  Reply

    Hi Ali,
    Such heart felt words, for a wonderful daughter, who has been there for you always and forever. Lucy is so pretty and to me looks just like you Ali, with such a lovely smile :-)
    For certain reasons I wasn’t able to have children, I would so loved to have a daughter I know the bond I have with my mum it is so precious.
    I feel that I am very lucky, I have a surrogate daughter (my very best friends daughter) who invited me with her mum to choose her wedding dress ( I cried). Now she has a daughter who will be one in April and I am now her god mother, so she is the light of our lives. Take care Ali, hope you have a wonderful mothers day. I am sure Lucy will spoil you :-) xxxx Claire xx

  2. Jill Foster March 4, 2013 at 12:52 pm -  Reply

    Hi Ali
    I know just where you are coming from here – all children are very special but our girls – well what can I say. I know that I am very proud of mine for having the strength to get past these last few difficult months without complaining but just getting on with it and crossing off another tick in the box. Have a great week and a lovely mother’s day Love Jilly x

  3. Linda Thorpe March 4, 2013 at 3:32 pm -  Reply

    A beautiful tribute to your daughter…. I have 2 sons who I adore.. And 1 very special “princess” Hannah… Obviiously all of my children are very special and very much loved, but there is an extra special bond between. Mother and daughter.. I wasnt going to have another child after my 2 sons.. But at the last minute changed my mind as I wanted a little girl… And I was truly blessed to have her.. She was a whopper , 10lb 8oz of scrumptiousness. She is a delight and a joy to be around.. She is only 7 but looks after me if I feel poorly and bosses her 2 big brothers around, and is definitely a the apple of her dads eye, as are the boys. as I say I feel truly blessed with my 3 children, but I one heard someone say..A son is your son until he meets a wife. Your daughters a daughter for the rest of her life. :) x x x

  4. Sue Radford March 4, 2013 at 4:51 pm -  Reply

    Oh Ali what a lovely account of your beautiful daughter. She has the same lovely smile as you. I understand your words from all levels Ali, as I was blessed with a beautiful daughter, and a thoughtful son who has always been there for me too. You’ve brought tears to my eyes reading this blog as it also reminds me of the wonderful relationship I had with my late, elegant and beautiful mother.
    Have a great mothers day!
    Love from Sue Radford xx

  5. Susan March 4, 2013 at 5:23 pm -  Reply

    Hi Ali,
    What a stunning read. You and Lucy clearly have a special relationship. We always knew that’s apparent. She is a special girl. I didn’t realise Ali that Richard and Lucy have parted company. How sad for all of you. And how traumatic at an already difficult time for the family. I often wonder how your Sam is as well? Life is not easy and you would be more than forgiven for not being your bubbly self with all that you have been through and continue to go through these last 2+years. But no you are a wonderful positive human being and I admire you muchly,
    Take care and enjoy your special day,
    Love Susan x

  6. Joanna Downey March 4, 2013 at 5:25 pm -  Reply

    Dear Ali, What a truly beautiful message of love for your Lucy. However, it was the last sentence that reduced me to tears, it was so moving and summed up your feelings about her. Enjoy next Sunday. Love from Jo x

  7. Magda Chetty March 4, 2013 at 5:27 pm -  Reply

    Hi Ali
    What an amazing blog. It is great to have Lucy and her love for you through the bad time as much as the good. She sounds like an amazing young lady, and is sad to hear that her marriage to Richard has ended but Iam sure she will find love again soon.
    I was not able to have children, but I am lucky that I get on so well with my step daughter and we have great time together.
    By the way, my arm is ok now I can do everything for myself now, so it is more or less back to normal. But this week I hurt my back, dont ask me how, this year has not been kind to me so far.
    You take care my love, and have a great mothers day.
    Much love.

  8. Dorothy March 4, 2013 at 7:21 pm -  Reply

    Dear Ali
    That brought tears to my eyes, its lovely when you have a strong bond I have the same with my daughter, Love you her to bits,
    Really sorry to hear about Lucy didn’t know she had split from hubby…give her all my best wishes. I sure she will meet someone and will be happy just like her Mum.
    Hope you have a lovely day on Sunday, you deserve to be spoilt
    Love and best wishes
    Dorothy xxxx

  9. Denise March 4, 2013 at 8:58 pm -  Reply

    Dear Ali, What a beautiful and thoughtful daughter you have.She sounds a super young lady. You are very lucky to have each other. Being the mother of a son I am very envious of mums who have daughters. At the end of the day though I wouldn’t swap him for the world! I wish you a very Happy Mothers Day and hope you get spoiled rotten!
    Denise xx

  10. Rhona Fenton March 5, 2013 at 9:32 am -  Reply

    Hi Alison, what a wonderful story about you and your Lucy you have done it to me again the tears as I read this, I know what you mean with every word that you said and just what our children mean to us, and the fact your Lucy has been there for you through all what you have faced will just have that extra special something:)I was sorry to read about her and Richard but it just wasn’t to be and I beleive there is a reason for everything and sometimes you are lucky to find out the reason why that happened down the line, but Lucy is a young beautiful woman who will find love and happiness again, and the fact that she has such a wonderful mum like you to help her through the tough times will help her no end, and now you are there for each other:) Have a wonderful mother’s day and as I alway’s say the best present off all is our children and just having them here:) love to you all Rhona xx

  11. Elaine sallis March 5, 2013 at 3:34 pm -  Reply

    Hi ali
    What a beautiful blog. The mother and daughter relationship is very special. Jodie and I seem even closer now we have Molly as well. It is my birthday tomorrow and she is cooking a meal for me and on Saturday she is taking me out for the afternoon for Mother’s Day . I have no idea where I am going she is keeping it secret. I hope you have a lovely day on Sunday .
    Love Elaine

  12. Norma Smithson March 5, 2013 at 7:41 pm -  Reply

    My dear Ali, I so wish I could weave words like you, you lift my spirits, and make my heart sing with joy because of the relationship you have with Lucy. I have two daughter’s very different but truly special in there own inimitable way, the memories of times we’ve spent together and thoughts of the times we have yet to spend, make me grateful to have been blessed with the birth of my girls. I’m so glad you had Lucy with you on your long and harduous journey, she’s obviously been a tower of strength to you, and as close as you were I’m sure it brought you even closer. When it comes to Mothering Sunday I shall be with just one of my daughters but my thoughts and love will be with them both, but I shall be thinking of you and Lucy too and hoping you have many many more Mothering Sundays together. Much Love to you both Norma xx

  13. s March 5, 2013 at 9:01 pm -  Reply

    Dear Ali So sorry i guessed wrong, i did not know Lucy’s marriage had ended, so sad but i’m sure she will meet someone nice who she will be very happy with.Lovely blog about Lucy, i understand how proud you are of her as i am of my daughter who has helped me through illnesses and sad times. Love the pics, how alike you are and the one of Lucy as a baby is so lovely, she is beautiful inside and out. As Lucy has helped you through sad, bad times i’m sure you are helping her.Take care.Love to both of you. As one door closes another opens. BabsQ xxxx

  14. alison keenan March 5, 2013 at 9:11 pm -  Reply

    My dear Claire, Your lovely comment brought a tear to my eye, and I will pass on your kind words to Lucy – although she’s probably read them already! I am so sorry to hear that you were not able to have children, but am so glad that your dear friend has always shared her daughter with you, and that the bond between all three of you is obviously incredibly strong. How wonderful to have gone along to choose the wedding dress (I too cried..) and now following the wedding, you have a gorgeous god daughter….I am sure you will always be the light of her life too. Lucy has arranged to take me out to a rather swish restaurant on Sunday, so I am very much looking forward to that, and feel incredibly spoiled. I hope you have time to spend with your family on that day too. With love, Ali xx

  15. alison keenan March 5, 2013 at 9:13 pm -  Reply

    Jilly, you’re right, you have every reason to be proud of your daughter, she has done amazingly well, but as I have said before, it would have been a great deal harder for her without your constant support, love and kindness… I hope you too have a truly lovely Mother’s Day, as you very much deserve it, love Ali xx

  16. alison keenan March 5, 2013 at 9:18 pm -  Reply

    By jingo Linda, 10 and a half pounds! That is a major size for a baby – I know I was only 6 ounces behind you, but every bit counts eh?! Seven is just a dinky age too, and I am delighted to hear that she is the apple of not just her brother’s eyes, but her dad’s too.. perfect :) My two boys make the perfect trio with Lucy, and there’s nothing I like more than when all three of them are together. It hasn’t happened since Christmas, but I’m always hoping :) Enjoy your special weekend, love Ali xx

  17. alison keenan March 5, 2013 at 9:21 pm -  Reply

    Hello there Sue, I know this is a difficult time of the year for you, so truly appreciate the fact you took the time to write to me. I can only imagine how much you miss your mum…. your words conjure up an inspiring and beautiful woman… I am sure you walk in her to you, Ali xx

  18. alison keenan March 5, 2013 at 9:27 pm -  Reply

    Dear Susan, thank you for your kind words… Yes Lucy and I are very blessed – she has always been there for me when times were tough. It was difficult when she and Richard parted, but it was the right thing for them both…Some things just aren’t meant to be, I have come to realise, and at least they are both happier – in their own admission – apart, than they were together. Life moves on, and it is for both of them. Things not so good for Sam at the moment, but not really the right time to write about it… We just keep on keeping on, and know that one day it will all come good… I thank you for your concern though, and will continue to see the positive side… the alternative isn’t worth thinking about really :) I hope that you will also enjoy your special day, love Ali xx

  19. alison keenan March 5, 2013 at 9:28 pm -  Reply

    Hello there Jo, thank you for that… Lucy just texted me to say she’d read it, and it made her happy :) She is an amazing woman , and I have always known that she will succeed at anything she turns her hand to… changes ahead for her, but she’s ready :) I hope that you enjoy Sunday too, and are truly spoiled by your girls, love Ali xx

  20. alison keenan March 5, 2013 at 9:32 pm -  Reply

    Magda, great to hear from you, although I am so sorry to hear about your back ache! I too have degenerative disease of the spine – you should see me in the breaks between shows – bending in all kinds of shapes having been sitting or standing for a couple of hours!!!I very much hope you will be feeling better soon. Glad thought that your arm is OK, and that you are maybe enjoying the warmer weather in Spain? I am sorry that you were not able to have your own children, but to love the daughter of the man you love is something very special. I am glad that you have a great time together. Enjoy your mother’s day won’t you, and thank you for keeping in touch. I am sure I’m not the only one in Ali’s Army who enjoys hearing from you :) Love Ali xx

  21. alison keenan March 5, 2013 at 9:35 pm -  Reply

    Dear Dorothy, I am so glad you have the same kind of relationship with your daughter that I do with Lucy :) Yes it was a sad time last year, but they had tried very hard to make things work, and this way they both have a chance of being truly happy…. I hope that you will be spoilt on Mother’s Day too – Lucy is coming up to take me to lunch – very exciting! I will wear loose garments! Love to you, Me xx

  22. alison keenan March 5, 2013 at 9:38 pm -  Reply

    Denise, I am very blessed. Would by lying if I said we hadn’t had our moments over the years – mainly teenage years! – but Lucy is a wonderful daughter, and has in the last two years been amazing, when I know it’s not been easy for her… I am so glad that you have a son to care for you though, and although it doesn’t come quite as naturally to them to be as thoughtful or caring sometimes, deep down they do care and none of us would swap for the world! :) You enjoy Mother’s Day too, and I hope you get spoiled rotten, with love, Ali xx

  23. alison keenan March 5, 2013 at 9:42 pm -  Reply

    Bless you Rhona, I didn’t mean to reduce you to tears, although I did shed a few myself while sifting through the photos of my girl :) Since she was tiny, Lucy has had an ‘old head on young shoulders’, and has often taken responsibility for a situation and sorted things when I wasn’t able to.. I know that the last two years have taken their toll on her, but she has always remained strong and positive for me. You’re right, she is young and beautiful and I know she – and Richard – will find love and happiness again. I very much hope that you will also have a happy Mother’s Day, as I know what a close family you all are, and I am sure they will want to spoil you. Take care and enjoy the rest of the week, love Ali xx

  24. susan March 5, 2013 at 10:26 pm -  Reply

    Hi Ali how are you? I missed you on mally this visit but watching Julia and flipping heck it’s like a big up the presenter fest!! It must do wonders for your confidence!? Can we all present with her please!!? Good grief lol. I have always adored ameka, sam and tiff..lovely normal girls but hadn’t seen Terri..and she’s stunning! Her skin is amazing. She has a real true elegance about her. You can pass that on. Hope you enjoyed your show with her. And put forward my idea lol. Night night x

  25. alison keenan March 6, 2013 at 3:59 pm -  Reply

    Susan you’re so right!!! Mally always makes us look and feel fantastic!! We don’t pay her to say those things honest!!! :) Amica does look gorgeous doesn’t she – hard to believe all she’s been through, and Sam and Tiff too, but I agree Terri is stunning – reminds me a little of Suzi B! I will make sure I pass your compliment on, oh, and will put forward your idea too :) Take care, love Ali xx

  26. Gill (Nottingham) March 6, 2013 at 4:00 pm -  Reply

    Hi Ali. What a beautiful blog. Wonderful mother, wonderful daughter.Writing this through the tears!
    Sadly I didn’t have such a good relationship with my own mother but I do try hard with my two daughters. They’d probably say that I am very trying!
    Good luck to Lucy for the future, I’m sure that she’ll find the ‘right one’ one day.
    Love to you and all the family. Gill x

  27. Susan March 6, 2013 at 5:59 pm -  Reply

    I just had a real chuckle Ali! I just read on the tweet feeder thing your comment re ‘we’re still hot, it just comes in flushes now!’ I remember telling you I’d read that one day!! Hope you enjoyed Kathy’s new show…I hope to see it soon x

  28. Susan March 6, 2013 at 6:00 pm -  Reply

    Oh and Ali I did think that maybe things weren’t good with lovely Sam. I am so sorry. That boy has had a rough few years and I know it will never be the same again for him but for what it’s worth…I think he’s pretty amazing. All take care x

  29. mary morphy March 7, 2013 at 1:34 pm -  Reply

    Oh my Alison, two blogs within a few days..I cannot keep up! It’s been a difficult week this week, for which details will be kept to myself however your blog about your daughter was very poignant and, coincidentally I read it after returning from my sister’s having looked through a box of old photos that she had found in my mum and dad’s garage.Oh what memories they provoked..why is it that sometimes it is so hard to remember our children’s physicality when they were small yet one picture brings shed loads of thoughts and memories flooding back. I came across a beautiful photo of my now 15 year old Jack and 13 year old Chloe sitting on a bench in my aunts garden when they were 4 and 2 donning shorts, welly boots and sun hats (obviously an English summer!). My daughter had her favourite pair of ‘Tweeny’ sun glasses on for which her passion ( for sun glasses not the tweenies) still carries on, the more ridiculous the better! Last year’s were enormous pink hearts!
    My mum had three daughters and my younger sister is called Lucy, and like your daughter, she could not have been called anything else and grew up being called Lucy Lastic by our beloved Godfather who sadly died when we were ending our teenage years. We moved from Brockley near New Cross in London (Our road backed on to the fields of Goldsmiths College) to Wetsgate when we were 9 and mum and dad sacrificed everything to enable us to live by the sea. Dad remained in London during the week for work so mum brought us up virtually single handed; she taught us to be strong, independant women who could make a path for ourselves in life as individuals. She gave us her all, unconditionnally and supported us all through relationship traumas and helped my sister and I return to work when our children were born by looking after her grandchildren. Like you, relationship issues were supported and even though my mum knew that a relationship I was in for 6 years was not the right one for me, not once was there an ‘I told you so’ when it all went horribly wrong. Just a loving home to return to and an understanding that I had to find this out for myself and that it would make me stronger. Now, as mum is suffering from the effects of brain surgery and dimentia it’s our turn to look after her.
    I also thought that after my son was born I wouldn’t have enough love to go around for his sister when she came into the world. But,she arrived with a shock of red hair liking to the colour of a red setter and lungs as big as a football pitch. I wanted her to be called Molly, she looks like a Molly but our surname meant she would sound like a nursery rhyme character so Chloe it was. She has always from birth been strong-willed (Stubborn!) and never liked help. She continues to do things her way but is slowly learning that it is not always the best way and that asking for help is a good thing..except this week when, revising for her school exams next week she asked for my help. Is it Maths, I asked. (I am an intervention Maths teaching assistant and love a quadratic equation or a touch of trigonometry). No it wasn’t…it was french and latin and as she knows this area is not my strong point she had made me special Q cards to thats thoughtful!!! (So is the fact that at the moment, she enjoys ironing!)
    I think being a mum means that our mum’s legacy will always be with us and our daughters and their daughters to follow. I cook with both my children, something my mum always did with us. I think, being a mum to my kids has made me a better person and I am still learning. As I say to my two when the going gets a bit tough, “I have never done this before, so help me out.Its a big learning curve for us all but no matter what, we all love eachother so it can’t all be bad!”
    Happy Mothers Day Alison. Have a fantastic day. Mary xx

  30. Jilly March 7, 2013 at 7:16 pm -  Reply

    Thank you for your kind reply Ali – I am sure we will all have a lovely Mother’s day. Next week will be busy as my daughter gets her mapping on Wednesday for treatment to start around 8 April. She has just said this evening that although it may sound totally bizarre she is quite looking forward to the radiotherapy as this will be the start of climbing the hill to recovery and putting this behind her. Her last chemo will be Thursday and the powers that be are working out when she can stop the horrid “anti blood clotting” injections and go on to the tablets. It was so lovely to read about your daughter and how she has helped you through the difficult times and I am sure she will be as equally proud of her mum as you are of her. Enjoy your weekend Love Jillyx

  31. alison keenan March 7, 2013 at 7:17 pm -  Reply

    Gill I am sure that your daughters truly appreciate you, and if you don’t have a close relationship with your own mum then no doubt you have worked hard to build something really special with your own children. I know it’s not easy as we all seek approval, but I am certain that in the years to come, you will find that approval from those you’ve brought up :) Have a happy Mother’s Day, love Ali xx

  32. alison keenan March 7, 2013 at 7:19 pm -  Reply

    Susan, I remember you telling me that too – infact I now have a fridge magnet to remind me!! :) I suggest you set your recorder for next Wednesday at 10am if you’re not able to watch Morning Style – Kathy did a fabulous job, and it’s a truly original and very helpful concept – whatever your fashion dilemma, question, suggestion – it’s all taken on board. Enjoy – I did, for the entire hour! :) I hope you have a good weekend, love Ali xx

  33. alison keenan March 7, 2013 at 7:20 pm -  Reply

    Thank you Susan, you’re very intuitive, and you’re right, all three of my children have had a rough time of it over the last few years, and it’s not surprising we’ve had a few setbacks because of it. I too think Sam is amazing, and I know that one day he will find the right path… Thank you…. Love Ali xx

  34. Edna Munro March 7, 2013 at 7:43 pm -  Reply

    Hi Ali
    Sitting reading this with tears in my eyes about to overflow any minute.My daughter ,born 27 years ago is my rock.She was ever inquisitive and would not sleep.She was 3 years old before she managed 3 hours sleep in one go.Too nosey by half.At 6 weeks old in her pram,she attempted to lever herself from her tummy to look over the top of the pram.Reins needed for a 6 week old baby???Definitely with this one.I have so many little messages left for me by her over the years.A 2×3 inch piece of wood which said ” even if i am angry and say I don’t love you,I do!!!Her saying is not just ‘love you mum’ but ‘love you more than all the numbers.’Since her dad’s Alzheimer’s diagnosis,she has researched signs,progression,help,tips of how to deal with awkward behaviour etc and she is there for me at all hours.We instinctively know when there is something amiss with each other ,even if we are miles apart.She has worked so hard to achieve her degree and PhD which she completed last year.I love her to bits and she can always make me smile!Daughters are very special.
    Love Edna

  35. Linda March 8, 2013 at 12:15 pm -  Reply

    That was very heartfelt and brought a tear to my eye as others, ive never read anything on anyones blog but i will do now. I hope you have many more lovely mother days with all your children i dont have a daughter although two sons is enough whom i love dearly and vice versa and i hope that there are more mothers like that than not.

  36. Vivienne Wallis March 8, 2013 at 3:44 pm -  Reply

    Hello Ali
    What lovely words of your daughter. My Maria has been a rock since we lost my Husband and her father Christmas 2011. Always there with a smile and a hug. She always seems to know when I am feeling down as I do her. We are often referred to as ‘peas in a pod’ by friends and relations which she say’s is a lovely complement.
    Life as you know is more precious then any thing else.
    Love Vivienne

  37. Susan March 8, 2013 at 5:41 pm -  Reply

    Hi Jilly,
    I just read your comment about your daughter having her last chemo!! Woohoo! And I think she’s wonderful for saying what she said about her radio..she’s fabulous. I will hope and pray she has an ok ‘journey’ with radio and here’s to her future health. Take care, Susan x

  38. Susan March 8, 2013 at 5:48 pm -  Reply

    Hi Ali,
    That’s great you’ve now got that fridge magnet lol! I knew something was amiss with Sam in particular…just felt it. I am so sorry they have all had such struggles over the last few years. Life is really very difficult these days. Sad really but we all do what we can and get through! And I know you and your lot do too. I’m sure you, Debs and Kathy are all real pillars for each other when it comes to your broods. You’re a great bunch and I look forward to gorgeous Kathy’s show!
    Enjoy Sunday,
    Love Susan x
    PS Mally’s shows…boost of the confidence indeed! Fab to have viewers on lol. And yes Terri and Suzi do have a similarity! I see it now!

  39. pauline bradley March 9, 2013 at 7:16 am -  Reply

    i too have a very special bond with my daughter.She is an only child when they said i had a girl i was so overjoyed and we have always been very close.She is now 33ys with two children of her own a boy and a girl and she now understands the special bond betweeen a mum and daughter although gabi is only 2.Louise lives abroad in Rhodes so we are apart some of the time but we are lucky and spend 6 mths there in the summer spending quality time together and she loves to come home and she shows thomas and gabi where she spent her happy childhood.Life is not a rehearsal as you and now Julia are aware and these times are precious.We will be apart on mothers days but the skype will be busy.Enjoy your mothers day Ali xxx

  40. Sue Jennings March 9, 2013 at 5:20 pm -  Reply

    Hi Ali…what a lovely piece you’ve written about Lucy…you have a wonderful bond and I always say a Mothers love is unconditional and it’s a sentiment I write on every card I send to my only daughter Claire ( who is moving out into her new home on Friday) and although we have joked about changing the locks etc I’m dreading it !!! For the past 6 years I’ve had mixed feeling about Mother’s Day as my beloved Mum hasn’t been here with me to share our day she was truly my best friend xx. On a happier note Brian and I had a great week in New York and I did go to the Honora shop..I had the girls in stitches the couldn’t believe what an icon Ralph is here in the UK..I got a baroque necklace in Mint thanks to my other half …I came down with flu after coming home so watching you yesterday on the Real Pie show cheered me up no end I laughed all the way through and I was willing you to pick the sausage roll up… You looked amazing in the red Yong Kim top and you arm looks much better…I keep getting timed out due to me waffling so I’d better go ….take care Ali sending much love xx
    Sue Jennings

  41. Jilly March 9, 2013 at 9:37 pm -  Reply

    Happy Saturday Evening Ali – just to say hope you and Lucy have a lovely meal tomorrow and the day is special for you and your family – and every mother who reads your blogs.
    My family (four generations) will be here tomorrow to share lunch/brunch – although we do this every Sunday and every Friday evening – so tomorrow will be a continuation of every Sunday but it will still be special for all of us.Looking forward to your next catch up and I will update on my daughter later in the week. How I admire your Lucy to know her marriage was not working and to come out of it – not an easy thing to do but a very brave thing. She will meet the right person and be knocked off her feet and it will put any sadness she has had behind. He will be round the corner but Lucy may have to go round a few corners before he bumps into her!! love Jilly x

  42. Alison Keenan March 9, 2013 at 11:02 pm -  Reply

    Vivienne I am so sorry to,hear of your loss and Maria’s loss. It takes a truly special type of relationship for you both to understand each others needs, when you have both lost so much …. It sounds as though you have that perfect balance… So glad that you can be there for each other, and I am certain that your husband and Maria’s dad would be relieved to know that you are doing such a wonderful job of supporting each other, sending you both my love, Ali xxx

  43. Alison Keenan March 9, 2013 at 11:04 pm -  Reply

    Linda I feel very touched that you chose my blog to read, and that you have then taken the time to write about it – bless you. I hope you will stay in touch over the months, and continue to read each week. It means a lot. Love Ali sxx

  44. Alison Keenan March 9, 2013 at 11:13 pm -  Reply

    My dear Edna I loved reading about your daughter – she is indeed an absolute sweetheart and I am very glad that you have each other for support, whilst you care for your husband with his Alzheimer’s. Your daughter certainly sounds like a fighter, and you must be so proud of all that she has achieved over the years. Studying is always difficult, but even more so if she has been worried about her dad and trying to help you at the same time. Lean on those who love you Edna, and write down every recognisable thing your husband still says,,, it will be a comfort for you in the future I am sure. Sending you my love, Ali xx

  45. Chris Page March 10, 2013 at 12:13 pm -  Reply

    Dear Ali
    It’s a good thing that families don’t generally keep score, because I know I could never pay my Mum back for all the things she did for me. As a result, I’m closer to her than I am to Dad. She was the one who slept by my hospital bed when I was unexpectedly born with Spina Bifida and Hydrocephalus (back in the days before amniocentesis) and through various other health problems that tried their best to take me away from her, including Meningitis. And she managed to bring up two other reasonably well-adjusted sons as well. That’s not to say Dad wasn’t there for us, but he worked all the hours possible to give us a good start, despite not having much in material terms. It’s lovely that you’ve been able to support Lucy through her recent troubles. I know it’s nice to be able to give something back after people have fussed over you when you’ve been ill.
    And I hope Sam finds his way eventually. If it’s any consolation, I still don’t know what I want to do with my life in my mid-40s. I remember working as a volunteer at a project for young people (many who were in local authority care) a few years ago, and it was nice to have them look to you for advice in a semi-parental way. A couple of them jokingly referred to me as “Dad”. I’ve moved on from that, but I won’t forget it.
    Mum and Dad are getting together with their group of fellow expats, who also have children back here in the UK. I speculated with her that they’ll probably divvy-up the lunch bill and sent it to their repsective children.
    It’d be a small price to pay for services rendered if they did.
    Chris xx

  46. REBECCA COLLIS March 10, 2013 at 5:19 pm -  Reply

    what a wonderful read, it bought tears to my eyes.I love my son truely, but find as he is getting older is slipping away from me, ans doesn’t need me anymore, but like you the bond with my daughter is special, i love them both dearly, and very proud of them both.
    Love Rebecca

  47. Pearl Emery March 11, 2013 at 7:35 pm -  Reply

    Dear Ali.
    I hope you had agreat mothers day,as i did going to Sussex to see my son and daughter,but unfortunately there is one person missing that is my eldest daughter,who comitted suicide in 2002.
    Ali please can you thank Colin for such a fantastic album,we listened to it on the way to Sussex,and your blog about Lucy was beautiful,and i am sure she will find mr right one day.Hope you are keeping to you and the family Pearl xx

  48. Louise March 12, 2013 at 1:44 pm -  Reply

    Hi Ali
    Forgive me, I’ve been rather remiss in not posting for a while, but I have been keeping up with your blog. Things have been quite hectic at work recently; we have just been told we are being made redundant so, for the first time in years, I am sending off applications/CVs – thank goodness for uploading and emails – and attending interviews.
    Anyway, I hope you had a lovely mothering sunday. I was working, so mum spent the day with my two boys – Oscar and Caspar – till I got in. I always feel a tad sorry for mums who only have sons and, perhaps this is wrong of me but a daughter’s relationship with her mum is something special; even when she marries, it never abates. With a son, once he weds, his wife becomes the focus of his attention and love. So, whilst I believe he loves his mum as much as ever, he devotes more of his time to his wife. Also, should one’s mum be unfortunate enough to be ill later in life, there are things a daughter can do to help, including those little personal tasks, that she wouldn’t let her son do. How many mums would like, for example, their son to see them naked? I suppose that sounds odd, coming from a mother with two sons but, don’t know whether I’ve mentioned it before, but I used to breed boxers, and Oscar was the sire of my last litter and, therefore, Caspar is his son! So our relationship is not a conventional one! I have had daughters, the mum of the litter and we did keep some of the pups, one of whom was a girl. Even with dogs, the genders have different characteristics and natures.
    I’m 46 years of age and, because of the epilepsy, my mum does feel extra protective of me, sometimes adding a touch of much needed realism to my life. I want to do everything and sometimes it takes my mum to tell me to hang on, think about it. One example – and it can’t have been easy for her to interject – I wanted to move out and live on my own, so I bought a house. Summarily, I ended up in hospital on two occasions, had to sell my house, and am still living with my mum. Honestly, I think I’m better off here. Mum was right again, as always!
    Of course two strong minded women living in the same house, are going to rub each other up the wrong way on occasion, but I wouldn’t want it any other way. I’m sure we all believe we have the best mum in the world; my mum is so selfless and giving, I cannot believe she is for real. Why will she do absolutely anyting for me? Take me through to work when she should be going out for lunch. Even when I offer to catch a bus she will opine “no. no. I’ll take you through”.
    Since my brother passed away 5 years ago, mum and me are the end of the line. I dread to think of the day when I won’t have her. But I don’t need a special day to tell her I love her. Why would I feel any different about her on a designated international day, than I do on every other day of the year? I suppose it is official recognition for mothers everywhere, and they do deserve it.
    Well, I’ve gone on long enough – that’s my problem, once I start I have all of these storeis in my head, which I have to narrate – so you take care, and all the best to the family.
    BTW, watching the ojon show right now, and the supersize revitalising mist is excellent vfm. As I’ve just run out, I’ll be getting it, I think. I have hair below my waist and it is strawberry blond, so can become quite dull, and this product is such a great detangler, adds shine to my hair, and has an amazingly therapeutic aroma with it.
    Speak soon.

  49. helens March 12, 2013 at 5:50 pm -  Reply

    Hia Ali, how are you my lovely? Oh I know I shouldnt be sad about ‘Looma’ as it wasnt meant to be, but it does bring a tear to my eye, for your sake as much as hers, and your Sam, fingers crossed that if there is a God he will smile on him soon and give him all the courage he might need, we are all behind him, all your little army!!!
    Just come back from a week in Bluestone (it on the borders of the Pembrokeshire National Park) and i’ve had the blues ever since returning. It was so very chilled, I dont think i’ve ever been so laid back in my entire life, no dressing up, joggers and hoodies were the order of the day and the make up went on once and no a lot left by the end of the day. The people were nice, and I mean really nice, you know they meant what they said, no false remarks or quibs. Have a look on their website, its, well, fab, and if you do fance a break you must hire a golf buggy, my daugher and niece thought it was so funny, mind we had to draw up a list of who sat in the front last time and who’s turn it was to sit in the back!!!! The weather was cold but sunny, oh to be back there………………
    So lovely to see you looking so good on tv, you are a lovely lady and one to look up to.
    My Mum has finally had her hysterectomy and she and my dad and sister came with us on our break. She’s getting there slowly, a little down in the dumps though.
    Take care my lovely and all the very best wishes to your children and you.Keep dancing!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
    Luv and hugs
    Helen s xxxx

  50. Susan March 12, 2013 at 6:03 pm -  Reply

    Hi Pearl,
    What a lovely name. I am so sorry to hear you have clearly been through the most horrendous time and that your lovely daughter was missing on Sunday. I am glad mental health is being talked about and given more of a profile now.
    Thinking of you,
    Susan x

  51. alison keenan March 13, 2013 at 7:10 pm -  Reply

    Dear Elaine, so good to read about your Jodie and obviously Molly too. I am sorry I didn’t write in time to wish you a Happy Birthday, but I very much hope that you enjoyed your special meal, and also that your Mother’s Day treat was equally exciting! I’ll look forward to hearing about the surprise afternoon out! I saw my Looma on Sunday, and we had a roast lunch which was fun.. she had a great card made for me which I will take a photo of for my next blog – very sweet :) Take care, and hope to hear from you soon, love Ali xxx

  52. alison keenan March 13, 2013 at 7:18 pm -  Reply

    Norma, it sounds as though you have a particularly special relationship with both your girls, and although they are different, they both bring joy to your life. How wonderful to have all those happy memories to think back on. I too am very glad that Lucy has been able to be with me for so much of the time, and although my boys don’t always respond in quite the same way, they do care I know :) I am sure you had a wonderful Mother’s Day, and although you couldn’t be with both your girls, they would have both made it special. Enjoy the rest of the week, and the weekend, and I look forward to hearing from you again soon, love Ali xx

  53. alison keenan March 13, 2013 at 7:21 pm -  Reply

    My dear Babs, please don’t worry, the way I worded the last paragraph, you could hardly be blamed for thinking it was good news…. Thank you though for your wise words about one door closing and another one opening.. Lucy has moved, and is taking on a new teaching position after Easter so I feel it is all positive. I hope that the ill health you have suffered is now behind you, and am very glad to know that your daughter was there to help you when times were difficult… no doubt she is a lovely as you :D Take care Babs, and thanks for keeping in touch, love Ali xx

  54. alison keenan March 13, 2013 at 7:29 pm -  Reply

    Mary you deserve at least one housepoint for such a fabulous comment! I loved reading about your Jack and Chloe – those early years are so precious aren’t they, and the memories are something we will have for always. Thank you too for writing about your childhood and your mum… It has given me a real insight into the woman you are, the life you have led, the battles you’ve fought, and how as a family you always pull together. Interesting too your feelings about having a second child. I too felt exactly the same way, and wasn’t sure it would be possible to love another child as much but of course I did, and that love grew to include Jack as well. I can only imagine how hard it is for you to cope with your mum’s illness and dementia, but she has set a precedent that you live by, and all the things you currently do with your children, and the time you spend with them will, I am certain make them happier and more grounded individuals, and as you say, we will all keep on learning. I hope you were truly spoiled on Mother’s Day, and appreciated for being the very lovely person you are, Ali xxx

  55. alison keenan March 13, 2013 at 7:33 pm -  Reply

    Jilly you are very welcome, and please do pass on my very best to your daughter tomorrow (Thursday) for her final Chemo… She’s made it… I am so relieved for you all. Glad too that her philosophy is also mine… The radiotherapy is something to look forward to. It is the tin lid on the whole process, and is only three more weeks out of her life.. the long term benefits are mighty. I do hope though that she can stop the horrid injections and start on the tablets soon. I hope too that she wasn’t too cold today when she had her mapping done.. It’s a good idea to wear a warm cardi that you can lay over your bottom half just to keep the chill off while they treat you :) I hope very much that you enjoyed your Mothers Day weekend, love Ali xx

  56. alison keenan March 13, 2013 at 7:37 pm -  Reply

    Susan, I am so very lucky to have the kind of friends who rally around you when you need them to… We always try to be there for each other, and each bring something different to the mix. There are so many times when I really wouldn’t have been able to have coped half so well if they hadn’t have been there. And thank you too for continuing to write to me – it’s always good to hear from you. Hope you’re enjoying Kathy’s new show – I think it’s great! :) Take care and stay warm! Love Ali xx

  57. alison keenan March 13, 2013 at 7:41 pm -  Reply

    Pauline, how wonderful for you to have such a close relationship with your daughter even though she lives some distance away. The six months that you spend with her must be marvellous for you both, and how lovely for her children to have so much quality time with their grandmother. It’s good that they also have been given a little taste of where their mum grew up, and will no doubt visit you on their own once they are grown up. No, life isn’t a rehearsal, and although there may be times when you wish you could go back and change things, ultimately you have to have been where you’ve been, to end up where you are….if that makes sense!!!I hope you got to ‘see’ your daughter on Mother’s Day, and that you summer trip isn’t too far off. Thank you for sharing your memories with me, love Ali xx

  58. alison keenan March 13, 2013 at 7:47 pm -  Reply

    Hello there Sue, and I’m so glad to hear that you had a wonderful time in New York. I believe it was bitterly cold, but I am certain the time spent at the Honora store and your special purchase will have warmed you :) I can completely understand how you are feeling right now about your daughter moving out… Mother’s Day no doubt further enhanced that, and I can appreciate too how much you miss your own mum.. situations like this one are often helped by talking things through with someone older and wiser… My only advice is to keep things the same, so your daughter knows you are always there, and I am sure she will visit as often as she can. Glad you enjoyed the pie shows – me too!! Fab to have lunch while working :) I hope you are now recovered from the flu, and that Friday won’t be too emotional.. Keep in touch, love Ali xx

  59. alison keenan March 13, 2013 at 7:51 pm -  Reply

    Jilly, I’m sorry not to have replied sooner, but the last two days have been back to back work, so I am hoping that your special Sunday with all four generations of your family will have been a success. Yes it was a very brave decision for Lucy and Richard, but the right one for them both, and I am sure that they will each find happiness again. I hope to post another blog tomorrow morning before I am whisked away on an adventure for two days! Colin has organised something special for my birthday but I haven’t a clue what it is yet! So exciting …takes the edge off being 53 years old! :) Take care, love Ali xx

  60. alison keenan March 13, 2013 at 7:57 pm -  Reply

    Chris, I was very moved to read about your life, and can completely understand why your mum is so special to you… So much for you as a child to have gone through, and as a parent, such a distressing time too. It’s hard also when your Dad had to work all those hours to keep things going, when in truth he would probably have wanted to be with you too… Sam like you, is trying to find a way to move forwards, and needs something to focus on and fill his time with, but it’s hard to know what… I am sure the time you spent working on that project was rewarding – it’s so important to feel needed. Look after yourself, and thank you for writing on this page… I’m sure I’m not the only one who will be sending you good wishes, Ali xxx

  61. alison keenan March 13, 2013 at 7:59 pm -  Reply

    Rebecca, bless you… I do so understand, but maybe take comfort from thinking that although your son may not need you in the same way, he will always need you… :) That’s what I believe, although I still miss both my boys. It’s lovely though that you have a strong bond with your daughter, and I hope that you were able to spend time with one, if not both of your children last Sunday. Thank you for writing to me – I hope you can keep in touch, love Ali xx

  62. alison keenan March 13, 2013 at 8:05 pm -  Reply

    Pearl…. I don’t know quite what to write, I am just so sorry to read about your daughter…. I hope that over the years you have been able to find some form of peace, and I am sure your daughter’s spirit lives on in your two children whom you saw on Sunday… Sending you my love, and thank you for your kind words about Lucy – I am sure too that she will find the right person one day. Ali xxx

  63. alison keenan March 13, 2013 at 8:17 pm -  Reply

    Louise, thank you so much for taking the time out to write about your lovely mum, and for also talking honestly about your life and your epilepsy. I completely understand your initial desire to have a ‘life of your own’ but sometimes your health doesn’t allow you, and I am just so glad that your mum was in a position to take you back in. I know as you say, she gives a great deal to you, but I am certain you give back just as much. When your brother died the fact that you were able to be with her 24/7 I am sure would have been a huge comfort… I can only begin to imagine how devastated you both must have been. Oscar and Casper sound like wonderful companions and again, it’s good that all four of you can live together in harmony :) I agree that we don’t need a designated day to tell our mums that we love them, but for some, a little reminder that they are loved doesn’t go amiss.. Delighted that you enjoyed the Ojon Show – I did too – and Michael very kindly gave my hair a much needed trim afterwards. Your hair sounds gorgeous – I always wanted to be a natural blonde!! :) Take care, and please give my best to your mum too, love Ali xx

  64. alison keenan March 13, 2013 at 8:22 pm -  Reply

    My dear Helen, I’d be lying if I said there were no tears when Lucy and Richard separated, but life moves on, and it is a relief that there was no bitterness or anger..I too hope that God will smile on my Sam soon… it is courage, self confidence and self belief that will give him the impetus, but I thank you for your constant support and kind words too :) Bluestone sounded marvellous and I will indeed look it up online. It’s incredibly therapeutic to have ‘down time’ and I’m not surprised you long to be back there… I hope maybe you have a relaxing weekend ahead :) I’m glad your mum is recovering,and although she may be feeling down at the moment, it’s often a combination of the drugs and anaethestic that cause it. I am sure she will be feeling more positive soon. I hope your daughter continues to enjoy life, and that she spoiled you on Sunday? You take care too, and thanks as always for keeping in touch, love Ali xx

  65. Susan March 14, 2013 at 6:19 pm -  Reply

    Hi Ali,
    I just wanted to say I am so impressed with the way you put all your energy into our responses. It really means a lot to all of us…I’m sure. It is so kind. And I also want to say it is lovely that there are so many amazing women out there..and men..who have come through so much and are continuing to go through so much but who have a little ‘safe community’ on here. Always look forward to your next stories.
    Love Susan x

  66. alison keenan March 17, 2013 at 5:42 pm -  Reply

    Susan, that’s very sweet of you, and it really is an absolute pleasure to have that connection with you, and to reply whenever you are kind enough to comment! I agree with you… there are indeed very many amazing men and women who go through so much, and who feel able to share their stories here…. It’s wonderful that you all look upon this blog as a ‘safe community’, and I also believe it’s a great leveller to read about other people’s lives and how they cope… makes what we have to deal with, that much easier :) I hope you will have had a great weekend and enjoyed the new blog! Love Ali xx

  67. Sarah Gisborne March 24, 2013 at 12:18 pm -  Reply

    Ali what lovely words about Lucy she is so lucky to have her Mum.what I wouldn’t do to still have my mum.she passed away 4 month’s ago yesterday. I have read your blogs for the past couple of years but have never posted up until now.

  68. Linda Worth August 11, 2013 at 3:56 pm -  Reply

    Beautiful Ali….made me cry….you truly are an Inspiration….Very best wishes @-)- Xx

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