Well, monday of this week was one of those days for me!!
It began at midnight…I was launching our porcelain jasper Today's Special Value'. What had looked like quite a lovely Californian sun goddess tan throughout the day turned into something quite different under the studio lighting. Cue close ups of the hands and my dreams of appearing sunkissed and glamourous were instantly demolished! I looked as though I had been dipped in a mixture of iodine and marmite! How very embarrassing! I had been tanning my daughter first thing in the morning on sunday with my professional airbrush system. I should have known better than to do my own tan using this but it was early, I was pale, I succumbed to the arrogance of believeing I could do it myself! Wrong! Should have used one of my 'for home use' tans. Goodness knows I have enough of them! At least my knuckles are now looking less like orange zebra stripes a few days on!
So next…I spent monday running around doing this and that and at the end of the afternoon realised I'd had my jogging bottoms on back to front! This would be no problem for someone whithout the world's knobbliest knees but seeing as I hold that unofficial record it must have looked very odd. My joggers have 'knee bumps' but they also have indentations from my 'junk in the trunk' aka my rotund posterior! What a funny shape I must have been. Oh well..at least it wasn't as bad as the old skirt tucked into the knickers disaster. That's not for here…
Evening came and it was time to get ready to go see my daughter singing on stage. I went to put my 'skinny' jeans on. Managed to get them done up but did burn off several calories doing so. Then I did a sort of plie bend in them and rrrrrrrrrrriiiiip! The loudest comedy ripping noise came from under me! Here's the damage;
So, now I have the issue of trying to find something else to fit my vandalous bottom. Eventually, after much panic and throwing of clothes out of the wardrobe, I manage to find some more stretchy trousers. All hail the magic that is lycra!!
Next I decide to put on my fantastic, never been worn, new shoes. Just enough time to peel off the labels from the sole and dash out the door…
..or not! Why won't the massive white labels come off?
No time for that…. just had to get myself down to the theatre. Seeing at these are new shoes it was perhaps a bit foolish to think I could rush in them without severe risk of breaking several limbs. Especially as they have a 5 inch heel!
Somehow I managed to teeter my way there and enjoy my girl's wonderful performance. Big fat butterflies flying all around my tum all the way. So proud.
Needless to say the shoes were off for the whole thing. Why do feet have to swell when you take them out of your high heels? Who knows but mine seemed to have doubled in size and I felt like one of the ugly sisters in Cinderella trying to get them back on and holding up the rest of my row whilst doing so in trying to leave!! Think of trying to get a loaf of bread's worth of dough into a thimble!
So that was my monday! Thing is, a day like this in my life is not all that unusual!
Have you ever had one of those days? Give me a giggle and tell me all about it.