I love being a Mum. I am one of those people who always wanted to have children and I was lucky enough to have my dream fulfilled. I have loved every stage of my children growing up, from tiny babies, through terrible twos, stroppy teenagers to the adults they have become. They are my 'raison d'etre'.
It's funny but down the years they have each asked from time to time who I love more, and my answer has always been, 'I love you both the same'. In some respects this is an inaccurate answer as although I love them both the same amount, the way I love them is probably different.
Daniel was my first born and the overwhelming ache of love I felt for him as I held him in my arms for the first time is a feeling I will never forget. I was so enthralled with this tiny new person that I never closed my eyes at all on the night that he was born, I just lay and looked at him. He is my boy and I have an amazing relationship with him.
I think there was a time when he thought that I never made mistakes and he believed that I knew the answer to everything and was always right. This is not true of course and I think it is good for him to see that I am fallible just like everyone else. Over the last couple of years, which have been very difficult for me, I have needed the comfort a hug from those big strong arms have given me.
Sophie has always been the leader of the two, even though she is thirteen months his junior. She was always a very self composed child, quite happy to play alone for hours. She didn't and still doesn't cry often and sometimes that made me feel like she didn't need me as much as her brother did. Then came the devastation of the break up after her first 'real' love. The physical pain I felt is indescribable as I held my broken, sobbing child in my arms night after night.
Since then our relationship has been even closer than it was before. We are friends and confidantes. We go to the cinema on 'girly nights out' and she comes to our house for 'family nights in'. Like her brother, the support and love she has given me over the last two years is immeasurable. Whatever adversities life has up its sleeve for me, I know my children will be there for me, as I am for them, and as my own mum always has been for me.
Love Julia x
P.S. The winner of my last competition to win a personally signed copy of my book is Marian Bolton – congrats! You should receive an email shortly with further details x